As we entered into the first weeks of the 2020 Summer of Lockdown, I started to see several students display patience less frequently, frustration more quickly, and annoyance more consistently. I was beginning to struggle with the prospect of summer under lockdown myself. I tried to keep this in mind as I assessed how much importance to give to these changes in behavior. I decided to wait a few weeks and reassess.
Over that time, one student, in particular, stood out for their increasing frustrations during lessons and their resistance during lessons and practice at home.
This article is a case study of how the student’s parents and I turned the situation around and got the child back to their joyful and silly self, enjoying lessons again in just a few weeks.
As many students maintained a general level of frustration or decreased slightly as the Pandemic Summer continued, this student’s frustration levels increased. One red flag was two performance videos that the parents sent me. Usually a rather silly and goofy child, the student was visibly frustrated, with an intense scowl and frown throughout. I shot a quick email off to the parents, who confirmed that their formerly reliable home-practice had devolved into a struggle (they also weren’t sure what to attribute to world events). I also created an improvisation game that specifically engaged the child’s interests. The child enjoyed this game a lot; however, it wasn’t enough to overcome the student's frustration with the remaining lesson material.
The following week’s lessons had the student start with a frown and furrowed brow. Eventually, this came to a head at the beginning of one lesson, after we’d only done a few warm-up activities (i.e., nothing new, challenging, and potentially frustrating in the ways that new challenges can be). The student got very frustrated and emotionally expressive. It was clear that we weren’t going to get much done if we continued our regular lesson routine.
Instead, we spent the overwhelming majority of that lesson talking. We talked about what was going on in the student’s life, feelings, and things that made him feel that way. It became clear that he rarely felt in-control (something most adults could relate to in 2020!). Their parents told him what to do every day. I told him what to do during lessons. The student's friends even told him what to do while playing together.
We also spent time talking about what the student's practice sessions were like at home. I listened very closely to what parts of practice went smoothly and what parts had resistance. Those parts that were still smooth and fun are what we build our recovery plan around.
This child’s routine was to play their two favorite review songs, followed by a roll of the dice ( literally) to see what other pieces they would review that day. The student was in control of this part of the lesson and still enjoying it ( I think it likely that there weren’t many parental corrections during this practice segment, which may be part of why this child was still enjoying it).
The frustrations started to kick in for this child when the student's parent told him to pay close attention to all the musical elements during the review of the “dice roll” pieces. The child was very comfortable performing vibrato, tasto, ritardando, or other advanced musical elements I teach my students. However, the child found it overwhelming to play all of the advanced musical components simultaneously (this has been a bit of a struggle before this incident)
So we modified the practice schedule to give the child more control while still achieving some of my teaching objectives. The student was to drop all of their practice routines except for what they were enjoying. For this child, that was review. They would play their two favorite pieces and use the die to select two other random pieces for review. The student would choose one advanced musical element to perform with each song, as this was the child’s comfort level. After that, the student’s practice session was complete.
Of course, I want my students to perform all of these musical elements every time they play in the long-term. Additionally, I want them to practice their scales, review pieces, new pieces, and any other incidental items I gave them every day. However, there is no harm and an incredible amount of benefit in modifying these expectations when life circumstances demand it. Years of experience gave me comfort in knowing that the student would more-than-likely be back to a full practice schedule in just a few weeks.
While he didn’t leave that lesson in the highest of spirits, I explicitly told him that it was my job and the parent’s job to work together to make sure that he was having fun. I also let him know that it was the student's job to let us know if he wasn’t having fun. I told him that we would talk more about this in the following weeks to see how our plan was going.
The following week, we started the lesson by talking, not playing guitar. Unfortunately, there was still a lot of frustration in the practice sessions. I asked the child and the parent what they had done and when frustration began to overtake fun in their practice sessions. This frustration was due to a lack of communication between parent and child; the student assumed that the parent knew (psychically), which advanced musical element they were attempting in their performance. The student was also frustrated when the parent asked the child to reflect on their playing. We cleared up the parent’s lack of psychic abilities and trimmed back the parent’s reflection-oriented questions. Once again, we left lessons with a clearer idea of how home practice should go and also emphasized that our goal was for him to have fun.
The following week, it was pretty clear that the practice sessions had dramatically improved. We could get through my “normal” teaching routine (scales, improv, review, prep, new material) without issue. If I recall correctly, the student had begun to practice all the lesson material of their own volition. This was an excellent recovery.
However, there was still one small issue that had been nagging me for some time; the child’s resistance to attempting more than one advanced musical element at a time. To work with this, we created a scoring system for the student's playthroughs. I listed all the musical details I wanted the child to perform and let him decide the point value for each (with some guidance).
The child played through a piece, and I asked the child to assess their playing and give themselves a point value. Then I asked the child to play again. Initially, the child thought that points were cumulative; if they performed tasto on one playthrough and vibrato on another, the points would be combined. However, when I made it clear that the slate was wiped clean after every playthrough. Our goal was to get the highest score possible.
With this clarification, the student drove right in. Not only did this encourage the child to attempt multiple musical elements simultaneously without any commands to do so, but it also gave the child the responsibility of an accurate self-assessment. The child still had control over the vast majority of the process.
Fast forward a week or two, and the student was ready to move on from their newest song. Per my routine for virtual lessons, the parents sent me a performance video. In the video, the child’s furrowed brow and frown were replaced with silliness and fun both before and after their playthrough. The student was enjoying themselves. Best of all, the child performed multiple advanced musical elements simultaneously. The student was ready for the next piece of music and better prepared for the next challenge ahead.
“This one {activity}” seemed to be a big turning point in {our child's} enthusiasm for practice.” --Student's Parent
“Today, when {our child} started to get a little frustrated in recording {the} video, {our child} was able to regroup, take a quick break, and recover his silly, light-hearted self. We really appreciate all your hard work on behalf of {our child} and your creativity, flexibility, thoughtfulness, and persistence in your teaching. Thank you, Kale!” -- Student's Parent
