This teaching story shows the importance of clear goals and the road-blocks that can arise when parents create arbitrary, time-based goals. From circa 2017, this story involves a student I had already been teaching for quite some time. Through previous periods of struggle, we had established trust and base level concepts like frustration and perfectionism.
Our established relationship and understanding of these concepts helped open some pathways to more straightforward communication and a speedier recovery in this situation.
There were two contributing factors to this roadblock situation:
First: I expect my beginner students to play all of the songs they know every day of practice. The songs are short; this only takes 5-10 mins. It warms their fingers up, lets them develop a sense of ease on the instrument, and gives them a chance to play a piece at a high level every day (rather than only working on new pieces, which are a challenge and a struggle, but rewarding).
Second: While I try to emphasize quality over quantity, I think it’s just easier for parents to have a target time (say, 20 mins, in this case) to shoot for. I get it; it’s hard to be listening actively to your child’s playing to see if they’re reaching goals.
The student had been struggling for a few weeks with just about every aspect of our lesson. Review, scales, new material; all of it was below this child’s regular performance.
A week or two like this, it’s bound to happen. But this went on long enough that it wasn’t a fluke (especially considering the child had played the review songs at a high level for some time before this).
So when we started our lesson struggling through review material again, we stopped. I asked the student the standard questions. Are you practicing regularly (5+ days a week)? Are you playing review songs?
Yes, and yes, the student responded.
I asked the child to describe their practice session. The child said, “Well, I start by playing review songs. I start at the beginning and go through until I make a mistake.”
I asked, “What do you do then?”
The student replied, “Well, I go back to the beginning of the song and try again.”
I asked, “What happens if you make a mistake again?”
I said, “Well, I go back to the beginning of the song and try again.”
I said, “How long will you do that for?”
The student said matter-of-factly, “20 minutes.”
This practice routine is just about the worst one out there (and one of the most common practice errors), and I thought it best to make that clear. I also trusted the relationship we had built enough to ask a somewhat-pointed question.
I said, “That sounds terrible! Like, the worst. If I practiced like that, I would want to quit! Why do you practice that way?”
And the student replied, “Well, my parents say I have to do all my review, and I have to practice for 20 mins”.
Now, keep in mind, the student never even got to work on new material (which is usually the biggest motivator for kids… review is the maintainer)!
I told the student bluntly but with compassion, “Do not practice like that. Please! It’s no fun!” (I think I added a bit there about how he got to tell his parents that that was no longer the practice routine… a fun moment for a young kid).
From there, we devised a recovery practice schedule. We went through all the review material and found two songs that the student could still play comfortably. I told the student that they were to go home and perform only those pieces for review. Nothing else. When they finished, they would move onto the next lesson material (scales, new material).
I made it clear that we would need to relearn all the review pieces, but we would do it bit-by-bit and work out the problems together. With that, I sent the child home.
As I sit here today writing, I wonder if the student left that week feeling vindicated. I wonder if the student had suspected that their practice routine was just not right somehow. I’m also amazed at the determination this student showed, doing this both for the love of the instrument and the desire to reach their parent’s goals for them.
The next week the student returned. I expected that the student would comfortably play through the two songs we had agreed on; however, my expectations were tempered by the memory that it had been several weeks since the child played comfortably. I expected this recovery to take at least a month, more likely, six weeks.
My surprise must’ve been palpable when the student instead played through all of their review material! Every single song.
I asked the student, amazed, “How did you relearn all of that so fast? You’ve been struggling with that stuff for weeks!”
The student responded, “I don’t know... I just figured them out.”
I’ll never forget that response. I still wonder if it was only the pressure to reach a time target and play all the review every day. Once we took the pressure off, viola, the student’s true abilities returned.
Our established relationship and understanding of these concepts helped open some pathways to more straightforward communication and a speedier recovery in this situation.
There were two contributing factors to this roadblock situation:
First: I expect my beginner students to play all of the songs they know every day of practice. The songs are short; this only takes 5-10 mins. It warms their fingers up, lets them develop a sense of ease on the instrument, and gives them a chance to play a piece at a high level every day (rather than only working on new pieces, which are a challenge and a struggle, but rewarding).
Second: While I try to emphasize quality over quantity, I think it’s just easier for parents to have a target time (say, 20 mins, in this case) to shoot for. I get it; it’s hard to be listening actively to your child’s playing to see if they’re reaching goals.
The student had been struggling for a few weeks with just about every aspect of our lesson. Review, scales, new material; all of it was below this child’s regular performance.
A week or two like this, it’s bound to happen. But this went on long enough that it wasn’t a fluke (especially considering the child had played the review songs at a high level for some time before this).
So when we started our lesson struggling through review material again, we stopped. I asked the student the standard questions. Are you practicing regularly (5+ days a week)? Are you playing review songs?
Yes, and yes, the student responded.
I asked the child to describe their practice session. The child said, “Well, I start by playing review songs. I start at the beginning and go through until I make a mistake.”
I asked, “What do you do then?”
The student replied, “Well, I go back to the beginning of the song and try again.”
I asked, “What happens if you make a mistake again?”
I said, “Well, I go back to the beginning of the song and try again.”
I said, “How long will you do that for?”
The student said matter-of-factly, “20 minutes.”
This practice routine is just about the worst one out there (and one of the most common practice errors), and I thought it best to make that clear. I also trusted the relationship we had built enough to ask a somewhat-pointed question.
I said, “That sounds terrible! Like, the worst. If I practiced like that, I would want to quit! Why do you practice that way?”
And the student replied, “Well, my parents say I have to do all my review, and I have to practice for 20 mins”.
Now, keep in mind, the student never even got to work on new material (which is usually the biggest motivator for kids… review is the maintainer)!
I told the student bluntly but with compassion, “Do not practice like that. Please! It’s no fun!” (I think I added a bit there about how he got to tell his parents that that was no longer the practice routine… a fun moment for a young kid).
From there, we devised a recovery practice schedule. We went through all the review material and found two songs that the student could still play comfortably. I told the student that they were to go home and perform only those pieces for review. Nothing else. When they finished, they would move onto the next lesson material (scales, new material).
I made it clear that we would need to relearn all the review pieces, but we would do it bit-by-bit and work out the problems together. With that, I sent the child home.
As I sit here today writing, I wonder if the student left that week feeling vindicated. I wonder if the student had suspected that their practice routine was just not right somehow. I’m also amazed at the determination this student showed, doing this both for the love of the instrument and the desire to reach their parent’s goals for them.
The next week the student returned. I expected that the student would comfortably play through the two songs we had agreed on; however, my expectations were tempered by the memory that it had been several weeks since the child played comfortably. I expected this recovery to take at least a month, more likely, six weeks.
My surprise must’ve been palpable when the student instead played through all of their review material! Every single song.
I asked the student, amazed, “How did you relearn all of that so fast? You’ve been struggling with that stuff for weeks!”
The student responded, “I don’t know... I just figured them out.”
I’ll never forget that response. I still wonder if it was only the pressure to reach a time target and play all the review every day. Once we took the pressure off, viola, the student’s true abilities returned.
